Thursday, February 19, 2009

The ZigZag Café

We will be convening here at the ZigZag café, Suisse, on Thursdays for conversation and dialogue.

I invite you to stop by every Thursday for the question of the day. Your thoughts and participation are most welcome. Pull up a stool, avec un café, un thé, ou un chocolat chaud, et un croissant, and join in here on Thursday at the ZZ café.

For today:

How do you deal with people who have no respect for others?


John said...

No respect at all, Greg? This doesn't seem like a typical question you would ask.

But for people who are lacking in respect for others, I think it's easiest to distance ourselves from them, because let's be honest, who wants to be, or feel, disrespected?

I think it's necessary to exercise tough love with them, and to make sure that they know that you respect THEM as a person. In my experiences, people who don't give respect expect an inordinately high level of respect from others.

Greg said...

Thanks for this. The last couple of sentences especially make good points.

The question comes out of a context where some people seem to think nothing of continually violating the rights of others and taking advantage of them. Unfortunately, any respect there is amounts to a charade. No doubt this is partially due to a me centeredness that consciously or unconsciously assumes that the 'I' is all that counts.

Anonymous said...


It is also helpful to confront him appealling to his conscience.


Greg said...

Thanks Micha. Yes, the conscience would be a valid appeal if it can be dug out from subterfuge of almighty 'I'.

Susan Barnes said...

I came by on Thursday but I wasn't quite sure what to say.

Before you can speak into people's lives you actually do need to gain their respect. I think you do this by never giving into them and by maintaining strong boundaries. Tough love as John said.

Greg said...

It's a hard question. Thanks for the comment.